Women's intimate portraiture

Reflections From a Mother | Orange County Boudoir Photographer

May 8, 2018

“To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow.” —Maya Angelou

Mothers. There is so much to say about the women that raised us. For most of us, we don’t know where we would be without our moms. They are the one constant in our lives that will always be there. No matter how we push them away when we’re younger (sorry!), their love for us is so huge that they tend to be our biggest supporters.

Our mothers are the first people we learn from. I remember watching my mom as I grew up. She was always so busy, yet seemed so calm and available. She knew exactly the things I needed, and made sure I was always taken care of. Actually, that’s the thing I remember about her most. She was always taking care of those around her.

When we would go to a party, we were always the first there and last to leave. Not only because my mom was very social, but she enjoyed helping. I remember walking out of my room in the middle of the night to my mom on the phone or with a friend on the couch. I didn’t know it then, but she was someone people leaned on during hard times. She enjoyed boosting her friends and letting them know that they were not alone, but there was a team behind them. I was very young when I saw this, and I knew that that was something I wanted to be.

Seeing the woman she was pushed me to want to be more for myself. I wanted to be an encourager. I wanted to be someone that women could lean on. I wanted to show other women that in this ugly world, where were put against each other, that if we just make the choice to love on each other, it can be so beautiful.

But growing up isn’t easy. You realize that sometimes the world can make you feel so small and you want to give up. There were times people were so cruel and I just wanted to let them win. But I remembered that woman. Somehow my mom made it through without breaking, and so could I. Then I started really remembering back…

My mom was very strong and caring. One that always put others before herself. It was truly admirable. But I remember her crying so often. I remember her breaking down, at what seemed random points to me, throughout the day. She would let out some tears and pick herself up. Sometimes even on her most emotional days, no one would know; because she would never let how she was feeling inside interfere with how she treated those around her.

I saw her as such a strong woman, but she had her self doubts. She had moments where she hated herself and questioned everything she did, but somehow she always rose above it.

We learn a lot from the women who raise us. Sometimes it’s exactly who we want to be and more, and sometimes they show us how we want to be different. Either way, they make us stronger.

With Mother’s Day approaching, take her in. Whether she was the perfect mom and more, or could have been better, remember that without her you wouldn’t be you. Try to learn from her and learn about her. No one is perfect, and even though we may see our moms as the strongest people alive, they have their crushing moments too. What matters most is how we let those moment defy us.

To the beautiful moms out there, future mothers to be, and even those that don’t see kids in their future; you have one job. Be beautiful. Be yourself. Because you never know who is watching and who you are molding on this journey of life. Remember that you deserve all the love you give. If we all could just embrace ourselves a little more, imagine how powerful we could be.

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